The Interview
by Y2Jen
Summary: The Fox news team gets a very rare and special treat, to interview the cast of trainers from Pokemon. This is a very funny story, PG13 for language and sexual situations. Enjoy and laugh your stomach off.


Announcer: This is LA's Fox11 News at 10.  
  
Christine: Good evening, I'm Christine Divine.  
  
John: And I'm John Beard.  
  
Christine: Our top story tonight, yet another high speed chase is under way. We have had over a dozen this summer alone and TV show companies are outraged at the 15 minute of fame drivers stealing their air time. It just goes to show you, if one person does it, others will eventually follow.  
  
John: Plus, the return of El Nino has brought along some Santa Anna winds. But we'll take a look at that later on during weather.  
  
Christine: Later on in sports, The Lakers take The Clippers by storm, it's an LA rivalry.  
  
John: But first, let's take a look at the newest movie being made right here in Los Angeles. (Goes to a studio in Hollywood)  
  
Reporter: I'm here with the director of the latest film. Miles, what is your movie about?  
  
Miles: Well, this movie is for kids and teens of the liking. The Pokemon and Digimon craze is racing neck and neck right now for the top. So, what would be the best movie to make right now? A Pokemon and Digimon movie.  
  
Reporter: Very true. We'll have another live update inside the studio later tonight.  
  
Christine: Coming up next, we get an interview with the stars of Pokemon and get a one on one with the great ones. Here on Fox 11 News at 10. (After commercial break) Welcome back everyone. I'm sitting here with the trainers of the show Ash, Misty, Brock, Tracey, Jessy and James. Hello.  
  
Cast: Hi Christine!  
  
Christine: Let's start with you Ash, you are said to be the hero of the show.  
  
Ash: (arrogantly) Yea, well I tend to be quite the main character now don't I?  
  
Misty: (sarcastic) Wait a sec, you think you're the main character? Ha! Who died and made you mayor?  
  
Ash: (Brief pause) Uh, is that a multiple choice question?  
  
Brock: (rolling eyes) Gees Ash, go back to the 5th grade why don't you?  
  
Ash: (angrily) Oh, it's this again? Hello! I'm what the industry calls a "child actor"? I'm not a baby!  
  
Christine: Excuse me, I don't mean to interrupt a debate, but can we complete the interview first?  
  
Ash: (snooty) Yes, how rude of my lower colleagues.  
  
Jessy: (muttering) Lower, look who's talking!  
  
James: (jumping in) Yea!  
  
Jessy: (sharply) Quiet, you can relate!  
  
James: (whiny) Hey, shut up!  
  
Christine: Please people!  
  
Cast: Oh, right. Sorry.  
  
Christine: Ok Ash, we have a couple of questions.  
  
Misty: (slyly) He's afraid of needles, his goal is to join The Lakers and his biggest secret is that he lost all his other rolls due to strep throat.  
  
Ash: (shocked) Hey!  
  
Christine: Uh, no, those weren't the questions actually. Ash, tell us a little about yourself?  
  
Ash: Well, I began acting before I was 10, Pokemon is just my most recent. As of this date I am 17 and going on 18. I have always lived in Los Angeles, California and live with my mom, cats and dog.  
  
Christine: Thank you Ash. Tracey, let's hear from you next. How did you come to be in a show such as Pokemon?  
  
Tracey: (cowering on his chair) You never knew. Nobody knows who and what I am! I am a robot from the moon. I met Santa up there and he promised us all a big present this Halloween if we went out to look for painted eggs that midnight.  
  
Christine: Uh, excuse me?  
  
Misty: Oh, ignore him. (whispers) He just quit crack.  
  
Tracey: (smiling)Everyone knows that my crack house is your crack house, everyone is welcome.  
  
Christine: Well, crack is bad.  
  
Tracey: (taken in shock) Crack is, what? (Stands on the chair) I am a bomb! Once I hit the floor will explode mankind!  
  
Ash: (crying) No, don't kill Mick Foley!  
  
Brock: (cutting in) He means all of humanity you nimrod!  
  
Tracey: (yelling) That's it, I hear what you called me!  
  
Misty: (grumbling) Not you, you dumbo. He was talking to Ash.  
  
Tracey: (yelling) That's it, I'm jumping! (Jumps off chair and falls on his leg) Ow!  
  
Ash: (laughing) Ha, what a looser!  
  
Christine: (To Tracey) Uh, are you ok?  
  
Tracey: (calmly) I can't feel my body and I taste blood, other than that, I'm fine and dandy (yelling) you yellow livered lair! You were the one who smuggled illegal cigars and liquor to the US president for his birthday!  
  
Misty: (standing up) So, it was you who got into my stash!  
  
Ash: (shaking head no) No, it was Tracey.  
  
Tracey: (pausing) Oh yea.  
  
Christine: Misty, what do you mean "stash"?  
  
Misty: (embarrassed) Well, if I get depressed, and working with these guys I am every night, I usually cool off with a beer and a cigar. Sometimes I even go out with my boyfriends to gamble away my paychecks.  
  
Christine: Oh how lovely. Oh, Brock! It says here that you're going for a solo movie. Is this true? Tell us more?  
  
Brock: Yes it is, all of my female fans have been very loyal to me. (Gets on his tempted face when he looks at the camera but pulls out the young recorder girl from behind it)  
  
Camera girl: (blushing) Oh hello Brock, I don't believe I've had the pleasure.  
  
Brock: (putting the moves on her) Well we just met, of course you haven't had, the pleasure. (Points for girl to hide in the mop closet) Anyways, yes I am having my own movie. It's starting with a two hour television debut.  
  
Movie clip.  
  
Brock: (holding microphone in front of a brick wall) Do you always notice how men always leave the toilet seat up? That's the joke.  
  
Audience man: Man you really suck. (Brock pulls a pin out of a grenade and throws it at him)  
  
Other man: That was lame. (Brock shoots a machine gun at everyone screaming)  
  
End clip.  
  
Christine: (shocked) That movie cost 2 million to make? How do you sleep at night!  
  
Brock: On top of a big bed with at least half a dozen different girls each night.  
  
Christine: (jaw drops) Good god!  
  
Jessy and James: (annoyed) Ahem!  
  
Christine: Oh yes. Jessy, what was your life before you came to Pokemon?  
  
Jessy: (lightly) Well, I was a part time singer and actress for Broadways, and I was seen on my free weekends at the animal shelter to bring happiness and love to all my fans.  
  
James: (folding arms) That's not what the record says.  
  
Jessy: (pouts) Oh fine. I dropped out of school after getting pregnant..by him! (Points to Brock)  
  
Brock: (putting moves on her) Yea, it was wonderful wasn't it? Yup, I must have painted the school red with all the beautiful ladies in at least less than a semester.  
  
Christine: Well, before we run out of time, what do you have to say James?  
  
James: (acting like a rich actor) Thank you. Well, I had a normal childhood. I went to school, hung out with friends and played baseball during the summer. I was quite a pitcher too. (Picks up a dictionary from under his seat and hurls it at Ash's head)  
  
Ash: Ouch! Man, why must people keep tormenting me? (Picks up dictionary) Hmm, we really have to get rid of these things, but they keep coming back to haunt me.  
  
Jessy: (growling) Yea, unlike all you. You're holding me back.  
  
Misty: (muttering) Oh shut up you pre madona.  
  
Ash: (yelling) Would you all please.shut the hell up!  
  
Brock: (rolling eyes) Real original Ash, whenever you don't have your own line or quote you steal somebody else's. Why don't you just go have your name legally changed to Chris Jericho?  
  
Ash: (thinking) Hmm, that's not a bad idea. I wonder how much the legal copyright to that is? But, who in the blue hell do you think you are anyway telling me what to do?  
  
Tracey: (shaking) Would you all shut up please, I have a very bad headache! After all (takes off his bandana), this was white and it only became red from the blood from when you had security attack me.  
  
Misty: (standing up) You raided my secret stash.  
  
Jessy: (confronting her) You were supposed to quit.  
  
James: (pointing out) And you stole her pills to not make her pregnant.  
  
Brock: (putting one leg on his knee) Only because you dared her.  
  
Ash: (slyly) Ha, at least we haven't gotten drunk in the everglades and did it with another man.  
  
Brock: (gulping) How did you hear about that mistake, it's a lie James started after he caught me in bed with his girl! (All start grappling and fighting brutally)  
  
Ash: (getting his comeuppance) Back to you John!  
  
Christine: (stressed) You don't get to say that! And now we go back to John, or anywhere, just not here. I can't take this stuff anymore! This is Christine saying, here's John with the update on the freeway chase, and here's me going to hurl in the bathroom! (Runs off)  
  
Brock: (follows) Hey, wait for me!  
  
Ash: (getting comeuppance again) We'll be right back.  
  
John: (back to newsroom) Only I get to say that, boy.  
  
Ash: Sorry. (shrugs and leaves)  
  
John: Well, I guess you all will have to wait for the 11 o clock news for the updates, or just turn to another channel (looks off stage to others talking) no, don't go to another channel whatever you do, stay here. (Taps papers on desk and stares at camera until it goes black.) 


End file.
